When you experience opposition along the ASD path, it is very normal to feel anxiety, mistrust, bodily pain and fear. It is easy to feel that life is against our children and our families. Be careful of this dark trap!
I could not see it at the time of my son’s most challenging behaviors, but looking back ,I can see that what happened was NEEDED in order to learn and grow-for all of us.
No one wants to watch their children suffer at the hands of a seemingly uncaring world. However, we as parents can prevent progress by our own negative attitudes.
In my experience, I have learned that force doesn’t work well.Once we fight and win one thing, we have to keep fighting to keep it.
The truth is that there are many people in the world that want to help our children be successful-not just us. Finding those special people makes life much better!
The world really isn’t conspiring against us. Our kids often believe this and we must meet this test with acceptance and optimism of a good ending so that we can counter balance “catastrophizing.”
At times we may feel isolated and alone. Sometimes I really was. But not really because this pushed me to listen to Spirit and follow a path that was new to me but definitely the right one. We can always lean on the support that is not seen by our human eyes.
Life is more joyful when we can lay aside feelings of mistrust. I had to question myself many times before I could accept that my son’s teachers were not trying to hurt him.
As parents, we have more power than we realize. Our willpower alone can move mountains. Because the path is filled with surprises and fear, sometimes we become too meek or sometimes we become too forceful to bring true progress. If we can continue to look for the good in others , be tolerant, and use gentle goodwill we will steadily move forward.
When those moments pop up that trigger our doubts and fears, try to stay focused on the task at hand rather than letting the situation engulf into the evidence of a bigger problem.
It is not easy to stand up for your child’s rights without feeling defensive. The cost of the negativity is that it impedes progress.
We must continually cultivate inner independence and trust our inner guidance system for creative solutions. Keep a balance in your life by finding your own innocence and playful nature that needs to be replenished.
Take a break this weekend and climb a tree, play in a bathtub of jello, make mud pies, jump on a trampoline, or some other stress free game. Be an innocent child for a few minutes and bask in the freedom from responsibilities. Fifteen minutes can do wonders to restore your soul.
Here is a great example: